Can you enjoy D/s without sex?


Sex at it’s worst can seem like a distraction to an otherwise perfect power exchange.

At it’s best, sex can provide some relief to the arousal that many feel during #bdsm.

When I was as a houseboy for a dominatrix (Mistress J.), she allowed her clients to relieve themselves at the end. She would taunt them like this: “if you get it on my boots, you’ll have to lick it up”. That was usually the trigger for their climax.

Women often criticize guys for mingling sex with D/s, but that’s how it is with most of them.

I remember cleaning a lot of towels after a weekend of sessions. Guys who didn’t need the sex are rare but often valued because they gave Mistress J. confidence that she was a ‘true’ dominant and not just an escort.

In a broader sense, many women claim that guys are only interested in them for sex. It may be true that virile guys are initially interested in that. It’s the way guys are built.

A skilled domme can condition a guy to realize their deeper desires for happiness with a companion.

Mistress J. would often joke with me at the end of a night about “how hung he (the client) was”. That was her sense of humor. She wanted to dispell the negative feelings that nagged her at times and made her feel depressed.



“He was so huge,” I would quip with her, “he’ll be back for more!”.

About dave94015

interested in alternative relationships, visual artist, erotic romance writer and reviewer of erotica, drug rehab clinic intern - early 30's
This entry was posted in bdsm, bdsm-play, bdsm-session, femdom, relationships, sex, submission and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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