I was at a play party recently and 2 young women were standing at the door, undecided about coming in.
“But these people look old,” one said to the other.
“Yeah,” the other said, “They’re my parents’ age. I don’t know if I can relate to them.”
I went over and tried to encourage them to join.
“So what’re you doing here,” one of the women said to me, “you’re not that old!”.
“Well,” I said, “they’re my friends.”
“I don’t know anybody here,” she said.
“I’ll introduce you,” I argued, “just meet my friends for a few minutes and you can go if you don’t want to stay.”
They met several people and decided to stay for the evening.
“The young have a great deal to learn from those with more experience…people of a younger generation often feel that we can’t relate to their situation because the world is so very different now”
He goes on to explain how experience in the #bdsm world can make a difference in the experience of the young and to the older but less experienced.
As for how to restrain someone, handle a flogger or talk dirty…he’s spot on! But there are subtle generational differences in the #bdsm community.
Polthus has an interesting post about his expectations as a sub and the beginning of a new relationship with a domme.
“When we began corresponding, V (his domme) told me she wasn’t big on honorifics…” but he called her by her first name and she said:
“You used my first name…Don’t do that again. Ever.”
And yet he expects her to be: “Someone who shares vanilla interests and lifestyle choices”
This is an old-school style that isn’t supported as much by the younger members of the community except when playing.
It’s not surprising that many younger members of the #bdsm community prefer TNG gatherings. #bdsm relationships are different from those of the older “leather” community.
While we can appreciate the efforts of the older community to formalize the #bdsm lifestyle, we live in a very different time today.
People mistakenly believe TNG is “designed to keep creepy people out” but it’s not that simple (or usually the case). This post explains the reasons TNG was started as “a space for the younger members of the community to talk and discuss SM with those who are in a similar period within their lives”.