Stop shaming Dominant Women who submit

can a dominant woman submit…and still be dominant?

Mistress Tissa's BDSMlog

There is a faction of men, and some women, who are very outspoken about their contempt of Dominant Women who submit. I have seen them stalk and harass such women, proclaiming, “She’s not a REAL Domme! She submits!” Aside from looking like a troll, there’s a clear lack of understanding about power exchange as it exists outside of their porn clips and fetish fantasies, as well as some possible double-standards and hidden misogyny. Let Me attempt to bring these people into the real world.

First of all, I want to say that I do not trust ANY Dominant — female, male, or otherwise — who claims to have never submitted and does not have an interest to do so. To Me, it’s a big ol’ red flag. It’s kinda like when you have a supervisor who has never done your job and has no interest in learning what you…

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Being dominant is not something you “do”, its someone you “are”.

Some guidelines for female dominants to handle submissive guys

Slave to my Goddess

I found the following article today written by a female of course on a female supremacy website and thought it made a lot of some good points although it was titled different and I only took from it what I felt was worth talking about. My opinions and expressions are all italicized.

A lot of women, when a submissive male presents themselves, find the task of enslaving him too daunting. But by remembering these simple rules, you can easily benefit with no hassle at all.

I think we are all born to either follow or lead. This, in my opinion, doesn’t mean to follow or lead in every way in life. One may be a great leader at work and run million dollar companies and supervise a staff of thousands then come home and be a follower to their partner. On the other hand, one may be nothing more than a assembly line worker at…

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Denied & Caged

How a guy’s orgasm can make him doubt his submissive role in the lifestyle

Slave to my Goddess

It’s been a while since I have written. Summer is here and life sometimes gets busy unfortunately and at times we don’t always have time to do everything we want. But one thing that never waivers is my love and admiration for my Goddess. My desire to serve her never diminishes even when we are in disagreement on somethings.

We are still trying to fight through things within the lifestyle that most people would never understand unless they are also involved within it. Consistency is at times challenged due to life’s events that go happen but we are both determined to make this work and hopefully we will get to the point that everything we have agreed upon becomes the “normal” for us.

So in my past writings I have written about denial & chastity, in my opinion, two very important aspects of a femdom marriage, TPE, FLR whatever you wish…

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Is That A Thing? – Scratching

The joys of scratching & getting scratched yourself!

Slap Ass For Motivation

Aiheeseen liittyvä kuva

How can something so simple feel so darn good?

When you think about scratching during sex, it’s usually the woman doing the scratching. The most familiar mental picture must simply be this: long fingernails dragging down a muscular back while the man on top. The sex is so good that the woman loses all self-control and she just has to grab onto something. Most of the time, the woman might not even be aware that she did that. I’m never aware when I do scratch my partner during sex, but with Sir Atticus, my hands are more often than not otherwise occupied, a bit tied up if you will. 😉

So the scratching I’m going to talk about today is different. First of all, it’s Sir who is doing the scratching. A while ago, we kinda accidentally discovered that I really really like Him dragging His nails down my back…

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Double Standards in Fantasy, Porn, and Kink – 2017 Edition

the stigma against #sex in the USA (and possibly elsewhere) has corrupted even the best efforts to turn it into a positive experience…sad!

Femdom Ramblings from a submissive male

Yes, I’m revisiting a topic that I have written about before as it is fresh in my thoughts…

Today while leaving some comments on a blog entry I got to thinking about how there are societal double-standards when it comes to how men and women approach fantasy, porn, and kink. This isn’t something that gets talked about too often and I know that there will be people who have experienced the opposite of what I am about to write, but as a whole, I firmly believe that men and women are “taught” to behave and feel differently about these topics.

Men are expected to watch/look at porn. This is generally unspoken outside of locker room talk, but part of being “one of the guys” is to like tits, want to fuck, and have a large stash of pornography that is called upon for masturbatory assistance. For the most part, this…

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Chastity is not always fun.

sometimes the best-laid plans don’t turn out as well as we hoped….

Locks Keys

When I create a new chastity assignment  for Grumpy, I use a random number generator to determine how long it will last. This last assignment was a mere 23 days. LAME! To make it worse , he earned 4 days off of that. So this last assignment lasted only 19 days. I didn’t tell him how long the assignment was going to last and I could see the disappointment on him when I told him his assignment was over. I was just as disappointed.

Typically within about 24 hours of his assignment ending we play and I let him orgasm, unhindered. After this one, neither of us have pursued it, still 8 days after his assignment has ended. During this time, there has been no T&D. During our post assignment conversation we both agreed that this was the  most unfulfilling assignment ever.

We had to go out of town…

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Examples of why the stigma against victims of sexual abuse and the shame that comes with it contributes to less reporting of rape.


A hashtag started by award winning author and survivor Rachel Thompson asking why survivors don’t report has invited and received an influx of reasons and stories, providing a voice for those who so often have felt silenced.

I would like to tell the opposite side of the coins tale, the story of someone who did report. But this is to empathise with the fear of reporting in a climate where there are very few convictions, increasingly fewer with more complex cases. I will say it now though and I will repeat it at the end the post. I want to live in a world where a victim feels she can report, that she will be believed, that she will be protected, that she will not be exposed to further trauma.

Two and a half years ago was the first time somebody had asked me to acknowledge the possibility that I…

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